Fo(u)r More of It

Went to sleep a while back but then as I often do, woke up and felt like I needed to type this.

Like a loser, hit a bar by myself to watch a friend from way back play some music. Band was pretty good, not what I was expecting. Going to the bar though, it’s hard as fuck now. I can’t imagine ever going to one without something else attached like food or music. My social anxiety was at an all time high as I kind of hid in the back and eventually snuck out for a late dinner by myself. I feel like I am living the same exact life I was living in California.

This time of night I hear voices that tell me, well, they keep hitting me and waking me up. I get here and had some things to say and now realize I can’t say them.

Past 5:00 AM and they still have no clue. Why do I come here? Give people information they don’t need to know? I look and see who looked at me and wonder why anyone would ever, and then realize why. The conspiracy.